Happy 3rd Birthday, Trouble!

Three years ago, my little 6 pound, 4 ounce ball of Trouble was born. It feels like he's been here forever. There hasn't been a dull moment around here since he was born, that's for sure! Here's his story.

I had my last doctor's appointment with him on June 18. I was 1.5 cm dilated, so I was scheduled for an induction the following Wednesday, June 24. Pirate had been a really big baby and was a week late, so my doctor said we could induce to have Trouble at 39 weeks. I was excited to have a date set, and to know I had a few days left to get ready for the new baby. That Friday, the 19,  while my husband was working, I ran a bunch of errands with Princess and Pirate. I had to drop off Princess's kindergarten papers to her elementary school. I didn't want that hanging over my head with a new baby. We had a nice day together, and my husband got off of work early that evening. He was supposed to work late the rest of the days leading up to the induction, so we took the kids to the playground after dinner and had a nice evening as a family of four. That night we rearranged Princess's room. We put the kids to bed and watched a movie. We stayed up until after midnight, which was unusual for me at that time. I remember going to bed feeling really good about our family day and night.

I woke up around 1:45 to go to the bathroom, not unusual for me at 38+ weeks pregnant. I went back to bed and moved all the pillows around so I was comfortable. Anyone who is or has been pregnant knows how much work it is to try to get comfortable to fall asleep! I finally got comfortable, closed my eyes to go to sleep, and felt it. I felt a sharp pain go across my stomach, and felt the tiniest bit of liquid come out of me. For a split second I thought I peed myself. Then I said, "Oh shit, not now.". I was terrified. I woke Buster up and said. "I think my water just broke.". I'll never forget the way he jumped up out of bed! I ran back to the bathroom and started shaking like crazy. I called my Dr.'s office, which was obviously closed, to get the message that he was on vacation and to call his backup in case of an emergency. I called this other doctor, who I had never met, and he told me to go to the hospital. He said if my water had broken (I still wasn't sure) that they would keep me and I'd have a baby that day. If not, they'd send me home. Buster called his sister who lives down the street, and she came over to sit with the kids until my dad could get here. I called my mom to let her know, then my dad to get him to come stay with the kids. I had to stuff a hand towel into my underwear because water kept leaking out of me. By then I was sure my water had broken. I threw a few more things into my bag (which had been packed for weeks), and got the kids' Big Brother and Big Sister shirts out for them to wear to the hospital. I cried as I kissed them goodbye in their sleep.

I was shaking uncontrollably in the car on the way to the hospital. I was totally nervous and scared about delivery. Princess and Pirate had both been harder deliveries, and I needed the vacuum with both of them. I was scared of that happening again. We walked into my hospital room at 3am. At 3:30, the house doctor checked and said my water had broken, and I was at 3cm. It set in that I was having a baby. Contractions started coming every 5 minutes. I got my epidural (Seriously...the inventor of the epidural is amazing) at 7:30.  I got to have a little nap in the hospital. By 10:45, I knew things were starting to happen. At 10:55 I told Buster to get the nurse because I had to push. She checked me, and it was time to push. In my mind, I thought I'd be pushing for 1-2 hours like with the other 2 kids. Amazingly, I pushed through 4 contractions, and Evan was born at 11:08am! He weighed 6lb, 4oz, and was 20 inches long. It was so amazing to have him so quickly. Pirate had been 8lb, 9oz, and had paved the way for all subsequent babies. They all seemed to fly out after that!  Princess and Pirate came to visit that afternoon, and loved their brother right away. The next day was Father's Day, and Buster was officially a father of three. 

June 20, 2009

When he turned one, I was a little sad that my youngest baby wasn't exactly a baby anymore. We found out a few weeks later that I was pregnant with Donkey. We celebrated his first birthday the way all first birthdays are celebrated - with the birthday boy having no clue what's going on and crying because so many people are staring at him!

June 20, 2010

When he turned two, we went to a bouncy place at the mall with friends. He was terrified of the inflatables, and spent his time on the sliding board. Later that day I took him to the playground where he was more comfortable. Because Trouble and Pirate's birthdays are only 3 weeks apart, they share a birthday party. He was much more comfortable at his party last year.

June 20, 2011

This year, he is.. well, he's Trouble. We went to a party at a bouncy place this weekend, and he was a wild man with no fear of anything. Unfortunately, today is about 2 million degrees out, so instead of me dragging all 5 kids anywhere in the heat, we're staying home and playing in the baby pool. My husband is getting off work early and taking Trouble out somewhere special later. Sunday we're having a party for the boys, and I know Trouble will be very excited. He still doesn't totally get that it's his birthday. Whenever someone has called to say Happy Birthday to him today, he says it back to them. And he keeps asking when we are going to his birthday. I think he means party. So, Happy 3rd Birthday to my wild child, my Trouble, my big boy, my Evan!

June 20, 2012

An interview with a 4 year old

I read in a magazine the other day how some moms interview their kids at the end of the school year and put their interviews in cute albums to save for the kids when they are grown. I'm going to half-ass this project and type my interview with Pirate in a blog. If my blog still exists when he's an adult, he can read it then.
I just Googled "end of preschool child interviews" and a bunch of different ideas came up. I took questions from a few different sites and sat down with my 4 year old to get some answers. The idea is to do this for both kids, but we'll see if I remember.

An Interview with Pirate - June 2012

What is your name?  Andrew
How old are you?  4 but I'm almost 5
Where do you live? Westminster
What does your house look like? it looks like it is painted white
Who do you live with? Mommy, Daddy, Rei, Evan, Grayson, Landon
What is your mom's name? Amy
How old is she? 32
How much does she weigh? 4
What is her favorite thing to do? feed the babies
What is something she does not like to do? clean the toilets
What does she like to eat? bagels
What does she like to drink? coffee
What do you like to do with her? snuggle with her
What is your dad's name? Buster
How old is he? 36
How much does he weigh? 4
What is his favorite thing to do? take us for a walk
What is something he does not like to do?  eat gross stuff
What does he like to eat?  Corn flakes
What does he like to drink? coffee
What do you like to do with him? Play Go Fish

What is your favorite food?  Poptarts
What is a food you do not like to eat? broccoli
Where is your favorite place to eat? Subway
What do you like to order there?  turkey sub with no gross olives
What is your favorite color? red
What makes me happy?  going to the playground
What makes me sad? not getting new Batman toys
What are you afraid of?  monsters
What is your favorite thing to do? Go to the pool
What is something you wish for? more Playmobil Pirates
Where would you like to visit? Disney World
What is your favorite holiday? Christmas
What is your favorite toy? Transformers
What is your favorite animal? dog
What is your favorite book? That Batman book we got at the library
What is your favorite song?  Row, Row, Row Your Boat
What is your favorite game? Hide & Seek
What do you want to be when you grow up? a dentist
Who do you love? Mommy & Daddy & my whole family
What did you like best about preschool? Playing with my friends

Who was your best friend? Sawyer

What did you learn at preschool? I learned words

What did you make?  that octopus on the wall

What do you think kindergarten will be like? I don’t know

What are you excited for in big school? Playing on the big playground there

What do you think you will learn there? How to read

What is something new you want to try this year? playing soccer

If you could get only one present this year, what would it be? The musical Jake boat

I'm impressed he knows the right ages for both of us! I love that we both only weigh 4. I'm not sure if that means 4 pounds or if he has another measurement. This interview clearly took place in the morning because he named the foods we had for breakfast. He just had a dentist appointment this week, so now he wants to be a dentist. He usually changes what he wants to be 3-4 times a week. Disney World is a on the "Maybe one day if we hit the lottery or grow a money tree" list of things we'd like to do with the kids one day. And he asks for the musical Jake & The Neverland Pirates ship about 10 times a day. His birthday is in a month, but that boat is expensive, and he'll love it for about 30 seconds. Not sure it's worth it! Anyway, this was a fun thing to do with my little man. Hopefully I can remember to do this with the other kids one day too!

showing off his 2nd lost tooth

Pool Time!

*I've been really bad about blogging lately. I started this right after Memorial Day, and a week and a half later, I'm just getting back to it. It's been a busy week ;-)

Memorial Day weekend our pool opened, and we spent most of the weekend there. We have not yet attempted taking the whole family to the pool. It seems like it would be more work than fun. Maybe by the end of the summer we'll be brave enough to try it as a family. For now, we take turns with the kids. Only the three bigger kids went this weekend, and they all had a blast the whole time.

Our pool is public, so anyone can pay to go in at any time. We bought a membership because with seven of us, it pays for itself in just a few visits. I definitely saw some crazy things at the pool, and I'm sure there will be many more pool stories before the summer ends. I had to spend a lot of time at the baby pool with Trouble. That's where he felt most comfortable, and the big pool was freezing, so I didn't mind sitting with him in the little pool. He learned baby pool etiquette pretty quickly - where any toys you bring into the pool automatically belong to everyone there. The baby pool is gated, and the huge sign on the gate states that children must be supervised inside the gate at all time. To me, this means that you need to be in the gated area with your child. Apparently that rule doesn't apply to everyone, because some kids were in there alone. All day. I guess the baby pool itself is a babysitter? I don't get it, but as long as they left my kids alone, I didn't care.

Another thing I learned is that not all women shave their armpits. To each his own, but I don't get that one either. I was very surprised when this lady raised her arms to catch her daughter, and her pits were as hairy as my husband's. Speaking of body hair, I also saw a few men with hair sweaters. You know, where their hair covers their chests, stomachs, and backs. I thought they'd just shake off like a dog, but to my surprise, they used towels to dry themselves. I'm not making fun of anyone, just observing. Trust me, someone somewhere is probably blogging about the lady trying to tan her enormous thighs while chasing her kids around the pool. (that would be me!)

I don't understand the use of those giant water squirter things at the pool. Kids in the baby pool (the ones with no parents watching them) were squirting the other kids in the baby pool. More than once, other kids' parents had to tell them to stop bothering their own kids. At the big pool, there were adults standing on the side of the pool squirting their kids, and getting other kids at the same time. If you want to get wet, just get in the pool. That being said, I understand we're at a pool, and the point is to get wet. But I need to get used to the water on my own. I don't need you or your kids to squirt me or splash me. While we're on the topic, adults should not do cannon balls in the 3 feet. You could hurt yourself or someone else, and your butt crack almost always ends up showing. No one wants to see that. And then your kids and their friends follow suit, and everyone is cannon-balling in water that is too shallow, splashing people who don't want to be splashed, and there are butt cracks showing all over the place.

I haven't been to the pool in 2 weeks because we've been really busy. I'm sure there were other stories I wanted to tell at the time I began this post. There's a long summer ahead of us, folks... plenty of pool stories to come!

Playing Sports

I have no athletic ability whatsoever. Seriously, not an athletic bone in my body. At 32, after having five kids, I decided to try running. I haven't completely given up on it, but I don't like it at all, and I'm not sticking to it the way I should. My childhood experience with sports was pretty lame. I wasn't good at any of them, and I only played a season or two of the sports I did try. My parents offered for me to play sports every time the registrations came around, but I wasn't into them. I didn't really care about sports or want to be a star or anything. I played softball for a few years, but I got a later start around fifth grade, and by then, all the other girls had been playing for years and were really good. I did swim on the swim team for three or four years. I liked swimming, and I actually have some ribbons from winning some races. That was one sport where I did ok and stuck to it for more than one season. My parents asked me every year if I wanted to play basketball for my elementary school. For some reason, I decided to play in eighth grade. Everyone else had been playing together for years. Needless to say, I didn't try out for the high school basketball team.  In high school, I played JV lacrosse freshman and sophomore years. I wasn't good by any means, but I was proud of myself for actually completing two seasons of a sport. By junior year, I knew I couldn't be on JV anymore, and I didn't have a chance in hell of playing Varsity, so I retired my stick. Actually, I think I passed it on to my superstar sister... At the same time that I started softball, my little sister was in first grade and started to play as well. She was the superstar. From that point on, she played softball, basketball, and soccer, and she was really a star. I was more of a sidelines type of girl.

When Princess was around four, we put her in a soccer lesson class at the Y. It was very basic, but she did pretty well with it. As a first time mom with no experience in children's sports, I didn't realize how early you have to register for sports. So, in the fall I looked to sign her up for soccer, and all the registrations were closed. It was ok, I'd be more on top of it the next year. Then I forgot about it again. Now she's eight and has never been on a soccer team. Oops.

When she was in kindergarten, I managed to get the registration time right and sign her up for softball. She was in the beginner league and learned the basics. She definitely didn't love it, but stuck with it that season. Her favorite part of playing softball was the participation trophy she got after the last game. Last year, in first grade, I asked if she wanted to play but she didn't want to. So, I came up with the brilliant idea of having her play lacrosse. I had visions of her playing from first grade all the way through high school, maybe even in college. Even though I wasn't great at it when I played, I could picture myself teaching her some of the basic skills and going to the park to play catch. I thought my old stick might even be in my parents' attic somewhere. Oh, this was going to be so much fun, and so bonding for us!

So, I signed her up. And I paid a lot for it. Kids' sports are freaking expensive. Maybe other people don't think the cost is too high, but I think they're too much money. But since I had a superstar in training, I spent the money. When we got the email with team assignments and the list of what was needed, we spent another small fortune on her stick, goggles, and mouth guard. Thankfully her cleats from the short-lived softball career still fit. I practiced playing catch with her a few times in the back yard before her first practice. When we got to the day of the first practice, I was definitely more excited than Princess. When we had a little over an hour until practice time, I remembered her mouth guard. We needed to mold it to her mouth. It was an excruciating experience. She was crying, gagging, looking like she was going to barf all over the place. I didn't remember it being that bad, but I was fifteen the last time I molded a mouth guard. To a seven year old, it's probably pretty scary. We kept cutting it shorter and shorter, to the point where it looked like it would barely cover her teeth. Yet she still gagged on it. We left for practice anyway, and I figured I'd ask the coach for tips on making it better for Princess. We got to practice, and I was back to being stoked about her playing. I saw lots of people I knew at the field, and I was feeling good about having a daughter playing lacrosse. The kids split into their teams, met their coaches, and started a rotation of stations introducing them to the basic skills needed to play lacrosse.

It took me about two seconds to realize Princess had inherited my athleticism. She was much taller than most of the other kids. She was much less aggressive than the other kids. When everyone ran in to scoop up the ball, she kind of hung back and let everyone else get to it. She was more interested in talking to her friends from school than actually playing lacrosse. She stopped for a drink about ten times more than everyone else. One of the times she came to me for her water bottle I realized she wasn't wearing her mouthguard. She said, "I'm supposed to wear it?". Wow. I made her put it in and she immediately started gagging. When she got back on the field I watched her take the mouthguard out and stick it in her pocket. This was not going well. The rest of the practice was just as hard to watch. My mind wandered to her playing in highschool, gagging on her mouthguard and constantly pulling at the strap on her goggles, and I realized her lacrosse career might not be what I had dreamed for her.

When the practice was over she told me she hated it. She didn't like playing, she thought she was going to throw up from gagging, and it was too much running for her. I felt my bank account laugh at me since the money was already spent. The next practice was three days later, and she spent the entire three days whining that she didn't want to go and that she didn't want to play. We practiced wearing the mouthguard at home, which didn't help at all. In the end, her lacrosse days were very short-lived. One whole practice.

Lately I've been seeing a lot of Facebook posts about kids playing sports. It's a great time of year to be active and spring sports are in full swing. So far, my only experience with kids' sports has been with Princess. I'm pretty sure that with four boys to go, I'll become a true soccer (or football, baseball, basketball, etc.) mom. But for this season, I'm on the bench.

Trouble stories

Having Trouble, I now understand why so many things have been invented. Did anyone see Modern Family when they went to Disneyland and Lily was on a leash? I totally get it. We have a runner too. There are little child safety tabs on our windows that let the window only be opened a certain height so a child can't push the screen and fall out the window. I get it. We have a lock at the top of our front door. I get it. Child safety locks on cars, buckles on carseats, buckles on carts, gates at the top of stairs... those are mainly used for the safety of a child. For Trouble, they're used as restraint, to keep him in the cart, in the carseat, down the steps, in the car. Here are a few Trouble stories from the past week.

When my kids are playing together, I hear, 'Mommy, Trouble is doing ____' (something bad), or 'Trouble is going to throw ____ at me', or 'Trouble is climbing on the _____' about 100 times. To be totally honest, I ignore them a lot because they all tattle on each other. Usually what I hear when they are playing outside is, 'Trouble threw the ___ over the fence'. Yesterday it was his juice cup over one side of the fence, the basketball into the other neighbor's yard, and a dump truck over the back fence. Princess climbed over for the truck, and I lifted Pirate over to get the things from our neighbors' yards. (Our neighbors probably hate us.) A few minutes after everything was recovered from over the fence, Princess and Pirate both started yelling for me. Princess was holding onto Trouble, who was halfway up the fence. So, the two year old can climb the fence. Pirate would never attempt to climb the fence at almost five years old, but Trouble is doing it at 2. I shouldn't be surprised. He's been a climber as long as he's been walking. He was the first of the kids to climb out of the crib.  He was climbing onto the dining room table  grabbing the chandelier when he was not even 2. I guess I never thought about the fence though. I figured he was safe in our back yard. We even have a padlock on the gate because we thought he might eventually open the gate to escape. There's really no stopping the climbing. Hopefully he outgrows it or gets bored with it.

It's never a good sign when your kid comes up to you and says, "Can I have a wipe?", especially when your child is Trouble. He always does something bad at the most inopportune times too. This particular occasion was while I was feeding 5 his bottle. Trouble came up the steps holding out his hand asking for a wipe. In my experience, this is usually a sign that there is a "bid dween booder (big green booger) on his hand that needs to be wiped off. Silver lining - at least he's not eating them. With a kid like Trouble you have to look for the positive in all situations. Anyway, this was not a big green booger on his hand. His hand had melted chocolate all over it. Only it wasn't melted chocolate. Or pudding. Or any sort of food. It was indeed poop. On his hand. This gives a whole new meaning to Poop Hand. I have no clue why, but he had stuck his hand in the back of his Pull Up after pooping in it. It was so incredibly gross. I had to stop feeding 5 and clean scrub Trouble's hand, cut his nails, and scrub his nails with a nailbrush to make sure there was no poop left hiding anywhere.  I don't understand why he refuses to poop on the potty.

Yesterday it was raining all day. It was really humid, and although it wasn't hot out, the air had that sticky feeling to it. Normally I'd turn the air conditioning on in this kind of weather, but our A/C wasn't working right. (A sweet $400 later and it's fixed.) Anyway, I had all the windows open as well as the sliding door that leads to the deck. Trouble barely napped, which always sucks for me because I'm getting ripped off of my break from him. I sat down at the kitchen table to eat lunch in the 3 spare minutes I had. My husband called so I could fill him in on the A/C situation, and while I was talking to him, I saw something out of the corner of my eye on the deck. It was Trouble. Standing on the deck. In the rain. With no shoes on. I didn't even hear him open the screen door and walk outside, and I was only 5 feet away. He was just outside to see if it was raining, is his explanation.

These are only a few recent stories about Trouble, and they have all taken place in the past week. There are many more, and I have a feeling tons more are in my future.

Another Busy Morning

Pirate has always been an early riser. He wakes up early, just about the same time every day, right around 6:15. When he was younger, it was really annoying because we had to get up with him. Now he gets up and goes downstairs with an armful of stuffed animals. He watches tv and plays with his guys. It's great because he doesn't wake anyone up or bother his siblings. Occasionally we're lucky enough to get a "Mommy/Daddy (he alternates), I'm done!" around 6:30 am to start the day with him. He also gets himself dressed on the mornings he has school. On non-school days, he makes sure he tells everyone he can stay in his jammies longer because he doesn't have to go anywhere.Lately, Princess has also been getting up early. She gets herself ready for school, makes herself a bowl of cereal, and gets her things together for school. She just started doing this within the past two weeks, and I am LOVING it! She's the easiest of the five, but just having one less kid to dress and feed makes the mornings that much easier.

This morning was just a little different than normal because I had a dentist appointment. I know, what better way to start the day, right? My husband worked a super long day yesterday, and my appointment wasn't until 9:15, so I told him to stay in bed until I had to leave. I got up and made myself presentable, which basically includes brushing my hair and putting on a little makeup to try to cover up the circles under my eyes, and got dressed. Then I went downstairs and made breakfast for Pirate and Trouble. Fancy breakfast on the menu today - blueberry PopTarts. If you have incredibly picky eaters and don't want to start the day with a fight, you won't judge me. They went downstairs to play and I took Princess to the bus stop.  Once she was off to school, I brushed Pirate and Trouble's teeth, got Trouble dressed, and got them in the van to take Pirate to school. He was excited because my husband usually takes him to school and I haven't dropped him off in a long time. Trouble wanted to stay at school and naturally threw a fit when he realized he was leaving with me. I took him back home, and woke my husband. My babies who like to sleep in like they're teenagers were waking up, so I changed their diapers and got them dressed. My husband took over with the kids and I left for the dentist.

I was amazingly five minutes early for my appointment. Even more amazing, I was in and out of the office in a half hour. I like going to my dentist because they refer to me as 'Super Mom' which I've said before is one of the greatest compliments! Getting my teeth cleaned is always such a good feeling. However I still don't understand why they talk to me so much while my mouth is hanging open and I can't speak. I guess it's just a weird silence if they don't try to talk to the patients. Anyway, happy to report that I continue to be cavity free!

My dentist office is right next to McDonalds. I was so tempted to pull in the drive-thru and get me a breakfast sandwich. But I knew my husband had to get to work so I refrained. As soon as I walked in the door, he left for work. Normally he picks Pirate up from school, and was still planning on it. But I knew he was already going in to work late and he'd have to leave in an hour to get Pirate, so I said I'd do pickup. Of course this meant taking everyone with me. But really, after the Mother's Day I had, I owe him. Bigtime.

I love when I start a blog one day and can't finish it. I chose watching TV on the couch over blogging last night. I deserved it! I had exactly one hour between getting home from the dentist and getting ready to leave to get Pirate. This was my most productive hour of the day. I put Donkey down for a nap then got to work. I did all the thankless jobs - emptying trash cans & taking out the trash & recycling, sweeping, cleaning crumbs off the table and highchair, emptying and refilling the dishwasher, starting laundry... No fun at all, but had to be done. Then I sprayed for ants around the front door and on the front porch. Immediately after doing so, Trouble walked (barefoot) through the bug spray. We had an unplanned foot washing in the kitchen sink, which led to cleaning the sink, which led to cleaning the counters, etc. Then I looked at the clock and it was time to get everyone ready to go.

Donkey was awake and poopy, of course. After changing him, I put him in the play yard and got 5 up, who of course was also poopy. I'm amazed at how fast I can change a poopy diaper. I hope I get credit for it on a resume one day when I have to go back to work. Then I buckled 5 into his carrier and put shoes on Donkey and Trouble. I took them out and buckled them in the van. After that I got 5 and snapped his carrier into the base. We left for Pirate's school, right around the corner. It literally took me longer to get everyone ready and in the car than it took to get to the preschool. When I got there, the entire parking lot was full. So I parked in a handicap space. I had no choice, plus I knew what I was up against with actually getting into the school. First I unbuckled Trouble and had him wait next to 5. I unbuckled Donkey and carried him around to the other side of the van. Again, whoever thought of automatic sliding doors was a GENIUS! While still holding Donkey on my left side, I unlatched the carrier and slid it onto my right arm, then held Trouble's hand so he could hop out of the van. We walked right up to the school and inside and Pirate was ready to go. Everyone wanted to see the baby and I was embarrassed because I was a sweaty mess from the ordeal of getting in and out of the van. Trouble wanted to stay, but thankfully left without throwing a fit. Back outside, I had all four boys and my right arm was killing me. 5 is heavy by himself, even heavier in the carrier, and even heavier when I also have Donkey in my other arm. Thank God I parked in the handicap spot because it was closest to the school, and I would not have been able to walk any further to the car. Back at the van, I had everyone climb in 5's door and go to their seats before I put the carrier in and shut the door. I climbed in Donkey's side to buckle Trouble and Donkey. By the time I was done, I was sweating my ass off. Did I mention it was like 80 degrees out? I got in the car and blasted the AC and thought how thankful I am that I don't have to do that every day.
When we got home I went through the whole unloading process, just as fun as loading, but with the reward of knowing I don't have to leave the house again. Can you see why I choose to never go anywhere?! It's actually exhausting just to write about it, let alone live it! And I have to do it again tomorrow when my husband goes to Dad's Day at Princess's school. It's a lot of work! I wish I could just rent a person for free to stand in my house for the 10 minutes it takes me to pick him up from school. At least there are only 9 more preschool days left this year. Then I get to do it all again on my own next year when Trouble starts preschool!

Favorites of the Week

Quotes

"It's a good thing I didn't have to go to school today because I need to finish the Fire Fly level on my Batman game." - Pirate

Hearing Trouble say "Fucks". Having him repeat it. Then realizing he is saying "Fox" because they are doing 'OX' words on SuperWhy. Maybe I need my hearing checked. Or he needs a Phonics lesson.

Me: "Did you touch the pee that spilled on the floor?" Trouble: "No. I just splashed my foot in it."

Other happenings

Cleaning up the puddle of pee on the bathroom floor when Trouble tried to dump his own potty seat into the toilet.

Taking apart two sofa pillows to find the microscopic pirate swords Trouble hid from Pirate.

Cutting toenails on stinky clammy feet. Seriously one of the grossest Mommy jobs out there.

Cleaning up baby pee and poop when 5 simultaneously did both all over the changing table.

Listening to the fight over fruit snacks: Scooby Doo vs. Cars

Going to Pirate's Mother's Day party. His present says that he loves me for buying him toys and shirts. Works for me.

Aunt Na's Monday

Aunt Na is my sister. Her day on Monday was funnier than anything that happened here this week. Hopefully she doesn't mind me sharing. Here is Aunt Na's Facebook status summing up her Monday:

summary of my day...Went to work in a hat because I tried to save money by dying my own hair and the result was a gorgeous shade of neon yellow, found out that my DNA is MIA b/c the lab had no record of me being there, Nate got sick but I couldn't go home b/c I have no more paid leave, I hit a giant goose on the ride home, yet am so stupid I misidentified it as a swan, paid $250 to "fix" my highlighter head (remember I was trying to save money) and now I have red hair.

I almost peed my pants as she would call me throughout the day telling me about what was going on with her. I also had the pleasure of being on the phone with her when she hit the goose, which she also referred to as a bird, duck, and peacock. In case you're wondering, her son was better that evening, her hair looks great, her DNA was found, and the giant bird is now in birdie heaven.


As always, never a dull moment in this house of chaos!

Having a big family isn't an excuse...

Over the weekend, I learned that having a big family is not an excuse to not do things. It definitely makes certain things harder, but we can't always use it as an excuse to get out of doing stuff. There are still things that we won't attempt because of having so many kids. But there are things that we are able to do that we hadn't  done before. Nothing major, but things that we pushed off before thinking it would be too much. Going places is still difficult, and will be for a while. If we're truly not going to enjoy going to an event because we're spending the whole time managing the kids, we'll wait on that until they are older.  I will continue to choose to stay home during the day over taking all of the kids out for a quick trip to the grocery store to to pick something up from Target. With 5 kids, there is no such thing as a "quick trip" anywhere. Loading and unloading the van in itself takes more time than it is worth. If I have the choice to run errands during the day with all the kids or wait until the evening when my husband is home, it's a no brainer! But I know from experience that if the school nurse calls and Princess is sick, I can load the four boys in the van and get Princess back home in ten minutes. That is truly a Mom Superpower!

There are times where it is just easier to say no to doing something. There are also times where we try something and find out that before we try that again, we have to do things differently. For example, last weekend we went to my sister in law's house to eat crabs. Having a newborn, a one year old who is scared that we are just dropping him off therefore crying when anyone else even looks at him, and a terrible two year old who gets into absolutely everything in sight, made it impossible for either of us to sit down, let alone attempt pick and eat crabs. (I am aware that is probably the longest run-on sentence ever.) Sometimes if we get invited somewhere it is easier to not go, or to have just one of us go and take a couple kids instead of all of them.

The last time we went to church as a family on our own was in July of 2009, about a month after Trouble was born. Pirate had just turned two, and couldn't sit still. Trouble cried for the last half of the Mass, and Princess and Pirate whined almost the whole time. Back then, my husband was working every other weekend, and I never would have attempted taking three kids to church by myself the weekends he was at work. We thought it was too hard to take all the kids to church, so on his weekends off, we would take turns going to Mass, or just not go. We all went to church when Trouble was baptized, then again when Donkey was baptized. Both of those times, we depended on our families to help with the other kids while the baptism took place. Princess made her First Communion last weekend, and we only took Pirate with us to the Mass. We  realized that it is important for at least the older kids to go to church, so this weekend we decided that we will go back to taking turns taking the kids to church. Eventually we will attempt taking everyone, but not for a while. Having a big family isn't an excuse to get out of doing things that are important to your faith.

We have never hosted a playdate at our house. Princess has gone to friends' houses to play before, but never invited anyone over here. When she would ask, I would always say, "One day. It's too hard with all the kids at home right now.". In my defense, I don't know a lot of her friends' parents very well. Having all the kids is an excuse not to go to her school to visit during the day or to volunteer at events, just because you can't take other kids. She has had friend parties for her birthday the past two years, and I have met the friends' parents, but I don't know them well. We also live on kind of a main road, and most of our neighbors are older. If we lived on a court or in a smaller neighborhood, I'm sure we'd have kids in and out all the time. Anyway, Princess hosted her first playdate yesterday with her best friend. They ride the bus together, go to Religious Ed together, and Princess has gone to her house to play before. I am so glad I finally gave in and let her have a friend over. We worked around naps and the boys running around and the girls were able to play together. They had a great time! When her mom came to pick Princess's friend up, she brought her little brother who is Pirate's age. They will go to kindergarten together next year. He jumped right in and started playing with the boys like they had been friends forever. It made me so happy to see the kids having friends to play with, and knowing that if I give things like this a chance they will work out fine. Having a big family isn't an excuse to get out of doing things that are important to your kids.

This weekend I also took Princess and Pirate to do a fundraising walk for March of Dimes. In the past I never would have attempted to do this with all the kids. Having my husband home on weekends is definitely a help because I didn't have to take everyone. That would have been impossible. I took the oldest two kids with me and they did great! I should note that I completely underestimated how far 4 miles is, and given the choice again, I would have just taken one of the little guys in a stroller. Princess walked the whole thing and didn't complain once. Pirate made it halfway then had a complete meltdown. He was sweaty and dragging. Why did I bring him? Because I gave in that morning when he started crying that he wanted to go. Again, completely underestimated how long it was. *Sidenote - this walk made me a little nervous about the 5k I am supposed to "run" at the end of June. I can't imagine the sweat. Thankfully, one of our friends offered us an umbrella stroller for Pirate so he could take a break. At first, he freaked out about the stroller. I guess it's degrading to be going on 5 and riding in a stroller. I didn't care, it was the only way to finish. In the end, he was really happy that he got to ride the rest of the way and eat his goldfish. Having a big family isn't an excuse to get out of doing things that are important to your friends.

Princess just recently learned how to ride her bike with not training wheels. Yes, we are aware that most kids knew how to ride way before now. It was one of those things that we would think of teaching her, say we'd do it next weekend, forget, then remember at the end of the weekend. It's ok though, she is now an official bike rider, and only occasionally hits a street sign :) Pirate wanted to start riding his bike as well, and my husband made sure he took time to take them each out individually to ride over the weekend. He also bought a bike that both of us can use so we can go riding with the kids. He was able to go out for a ride alone yesterday. Then I did it too - I rode a bike for the first time in probably fifteen years. It has probably been longer than that because I didn't look at my bike again once I started driving. It's funny how when you're a teenager you can't wait to drive and not use a bike and now that I'm an adult I can't wait to go for a bike ride when my husband gets home today! We also spent way more time outside this weekend than we have in a while. Donkey doesn't get to play outside much because I need to be there with him, so usually I just stay in with the babies while the three big kids play in the yard. I do take him for walks with me around the neighborhood, and he got to play out back for a while over the weekend. Watching a new walker get used to walking in Crocs and on the grass never gets old! We spent lots of family time outside getting active this weekend, and it made us feel really good. We set a good example for the kids showing them that we can go for bike rides and long walks and run and enjoy ourselves. Having a big family isn't an excuse to get out of things important to your health.

It is difficult to have a big family. I know that it is a challenge to do anything having so many kids. I know that we will not do some things as a family until the kids are older. 5 may not see the inside of a restaurant until he is a teenager! But I know we can't stay shut inside our house forever. It is important to get out and go places and exercise and play with friends and support great causes. The best part? Doing all this stuff out of the house completely exhausts the kids so they go to bed without argument and sleep all night!



ready for bed!



exhausted after a fun weekend!

Favorites of the week

Quotes

"When I grow up, I'm going to marry Princess." - Pirate when he sees Princess in her First Communion dress.

"Ew, Pirate. That is so gross. You can't marry your sister." - Princess reacting to the above statement.

"I hided my ninjas from Trouble. But I hided them too good. I can't find them anywhere." - Pirate

"You can come down from timeout, Pirate, but you can't throw your place mat on the floor anymore!" - Trouble letting Pirate out of timeout, but it had nothing to do with a place mat.

"My teacher was at school today. I guess she didn't have her baby anymore." - Pirate after his teacher came back from maternity leave.

Other happenings

Cleaning poop off of the kitchen floor after changing a poop filled Pull-Up. It was also on my arm and Trouble's legs and foot. Needless to say, we had an emergency bath at 9:30 pm and lost a pair of pajamas. I don't clean poop off of clothes.

Watching Trouble dance to "I'm Sexy & I Know It" when it came on Pandora, and beingimpressed/embarrassed that he knew a lot of the words.

Seeing Princess ride her bike all on her own, finally! (She only hit two signs and a post.)

Donkey swiping Trouble's juice cup when Trouble wasn't looking, drinking the entire cup, and both of them crying at the same time because the juice was gone.

Catching Trouble running around the basement after taking off his pants for no apparent reason.

Donkey sticking his fingers in our noses. He hasn't learned that you can't pick your friend's nose.

Trouble was scratching his butt and I told him to stop. He proceeded to start singing "Scratchy my butt hole" to the tune of "Frosty the Snowman". I can't make this stuff up!

Never a dull moment in this house of chaos!

No. You will never sleep again...

Ok, maybe the title of this post is a little harsh. You will sleep. We need to sleep in order to survive. But you will never sleep the same again once you are a parent. If you are a woman, your sleeplessness (I totally made up that word) will begin while you are pregnant. And from that point on, you won't sleep, like really really good sleep, again. You'll get used to this new way of sleeping, and eventually it will be all you know. It's been a little over 9 years since I found out I was pregnant the first time. I barely remember what sleep was like before that time.

So, when you're pregnant, sleep sucks, at least at the end anyway. If you're lucky like me, it sucks most of the way through. In the beginning I was up to pee 157 times every night. When that wore off a little, the most insane heartburn kicked in. I slept with antacids on my nightstand. I would wake up with acid in my throat like I was choking. That lasted through the end of the pregnancy. This last time, I had horrible hip and leg pain from 5 months to the end. I'm assuming it was because of being pregnant for 2 straight years. Then I had sciatica on top of all that. My hips and legs would hurt after a half hour or so, so I'd have to roll to the other side. It's like trying to roll a beached whale back into the ocean. Add in three or four other kids who randomly wake up at night, and you're screwed.

Then you have the baby and sleep in the hospital, but let's be honest... hospital beds aren't ideal. To me, getting home in my own bed and finally being able to sleep on my stomach is like heaven. Except there's a newborn sleeping in my room who wakes up to eat every three to four hours. With Princess, my husband and I were novices. We both got up every time she cried that first night home. We didn't know what we were doing, bumping into each other in her room, making her bottle, trying to figure out who should feed her and change her. When she would go back to sleep, I would get this panicky feeling that she wasn't breathing or that she might stop breathing or that something might happen to her. I think I stayed awake all night worrying about her being ok. The next day my mom gave us this amazing idea where we could take turns at night. That way one of us could get a few hours of sleep while the other one got up. It helped us a lot. But when the baby wakes up, regardless of who gets up with her, the other parent wakes up too. So, you're not exactly sleeping through the night.

By the fifth baby, the first night home wasn't as scary. I went to bed at 8:30 right after the other kids, so I had a solid four hours before he woke up for my feeding. When you have a baby sleeping in your room, you're always aware of the baby's presence. You hear all their noises. This time, 5 would start to grunt as he was waking up, right before he would cry. That was the cue to get up and get him out of the room before he woke everyone else. Having a lot of kids makes nighttime trickier. We have the three older kids in one room, and the babies in the other room. We kept the baby in our room for the first two months, so Donkey basically had his own room. He's a really light sleeper and we were concerned about having to go in his room to get the baby. We didn't need two babies awake at once. When 5 started sleeping through the night, we moved him to his crib, and for the most part it is working out well.

But we still aren't sleeping normally. We get the new baby to start sleeping all night, and of course one or two or sometimes three of the other kids starts getting up. Trouble wakes up crying during the night because he has kicked off his covers. The kid who opens the front door and escapes, climbs onto the dining room table, and tries to fix his own snacks, can't pull up his own blankets? I don't get it. But he wakes up crying for us to cover him. He was also waking up crying last month because he had molars coming through. Expert mom that I am didn't realize this until I got a BabyCenter newsletter saying 'your two and a half year old may be getting molars at this time'. No wonder he was shoving toys in his mouth all the day. I just equated it to him being trouble. At the same time, Donkey's first set of molars was coming through, so he was waking up crying at night too. Then there are the normal night time wake ups where Princess or Pirate have to go to the bathroom or need a drink. Twice in the last 3 weeks, Pirate has fallen out of bed, so we have to go put him back in his bed. Princess and Pirate have bunk beds, and Pirate is on the bottom. He has plenty of space. Like my husband has room to lay with him in the bed and still have space. But as I've mentioned before, Pirate is a hoarder, and has about 286 stuffed animals in his bed with him. The other night I seriously caught him taking Donkey's stuffed dalmatian out of his crib because "I just love this puppy so much and I need to sleep with him". Apparently the other stuffed animals weren't enough and his hoarding has turned into stealing animals from his brothers. Anyway, the animals took over more than half of the bed, and Pirate fell out. Twice.

Now we've also hit the times where the baby wakes up Donkey or vice-versa, so we have two babies up at the same time. We get 5 when he wakes up because we don't want him to wake up Donkey, so we take him and give him a bottle. Or we'll grab Donkey real fast so he doesn't wake up 5. But we're not always quick enough, and sometimes they're both up at the same time. That's a blast because we both have to get up to deal with them.

So, yes, we sleep. But nothing like we used to. I can vaguely remember being a teenager and sleeping until noon on weekends just because I didn't feel like getting up and I had no responsibilities. Now, if we stretch it, staying in bed until 8 on a weekend is a treat! This usually involves having at least two of the kids in our bed watching tv. Last Saturday we had all five in our bed. But they were happy and weren't rushing us to make breakfast. Most nights when they wake up they end up sleeping in our bed for at least part of the night.

I know things will calm down and at some point in time, they will all sleep all night with occasional bad dreams or trips to the bathroom. And one day, they'll be teenagers going out at night (shudder), getting home after we are in bed. My guess is that I still won't sleep soundly, and I'll be worrying about where they are and if they are safe. I think once you're a parent, you never sleep the same again. I'm in no rush to find out for sure. For now, I'll take the sleep how it comes, because I know my babies are all safe and in the big picture, I'm lucky to get to wake up with them during the night. But I do still miss my good sleep!

Favorites of the week

Quotes

"Daddy, I'm Done!" - Pirate, two separate times this week!

"Popcorn and Pizza are not junk!" - Princess

"This dog is a chiwalla." - Pirate referring to his stuffed chihuahua (I'll be honest. I had to look up how to spell it the right way.)

Conversation

Me: "Trouble, what's your name?"
Trouble: "Trouble"
Me: "Trouble What?"
Trouble: "Trouble Charlos (Charles)"
Me: "Good! Trouble Charles What?"
Trouble: "Trouble Charlos Bad!"
The kid thinks his last name is Bad. Maybe we have to rethink saying he's being bad! Once we established our last name, he then proceeded to name everyone else in the house by addressing them First name, Charlos, Last name. Apparently we all have the same middle and last name.
*He does know our real names and doesn't refer to himself as Trouble!

Other happenings

Trouble trying to stick his finger in his stream of pee while on the potty.

Trouble falling asleep on the couch in the middle of the day. Made for a quiet 30 minutes.

Finding a Pull Up in the washing machine... after the load of laundry was run. Gross.

Poop on the couch - after Trouble pooped in his underwear and didn't tell anyone and it went through his pants onto the couch.

Poop Hand x3

Big baby smiles - 5 is smiling up a storm all the time now! So cute!

Finding out about the movie rentals on the TV bill courtesy of Pirate.

Seeing that the broken vacuum belt was a result of Trouble shoving a sock into the vacuum.


Again, never a dull moment in this house of chaos!

Poop Hand

It never fails. Every time the little boys actually take naps after lunch and I just sit down to feed the baby, Pirate announces, "I just have to go poop real quick." and runs for the bathroom. He's 4 1/2 but I still wipe his butt. I guess he needs to learn how to do it before kindergarten. I can't imagine teachers wiping butts in elementary school. I sure as hell wouldn't have back in my other life when I was a teacher. It's not that I don't want him to wipe his own butt, it's just that he doesn't get it clean. Then he walks around digging at his butt all day because he has "itchy butthole". (His name for it, not mine.) He also sharts more when he wipes his own butt. So, to make things easier, I just wipe him for now. But he seems to have to poop every time I'm feeding the baby in the afternoon. I'm also usually watching my soap at the same time, so I double don't want to get up to wipe him. Luckily when he says he has to poop real quick, he's right. He's in and out of the bathroom. I just have to pause my show (most importantly!), put the baby down, go wipe his butt, wash both our hands, then pick up where I left off. So, this happened today with Pirate (1).

Shortly after, Trouble came downstairs to tell me that he couldn't take a nap today. I'm thinking he's about to give up naps which will make me cry when the day comes. That 1-2 hours a day when Trouble sleeps is the most peaceful time of my day. Today, I just sent him downstairs to rest on the couch with Pirate. To my surprise, he did rest, just didn't sleep. A little later, when he would normally wake up, I took him to the bathroom to pee and changed him from his Pull Up back into his underwear. He went back to playing and was actually behaving himself. When 5 started crying in his swing, I realized that he had pooped, and because he was in the swing, the poop had squished up his back onto his onesie (2). (Another onesie bites the dust because I don't scrub poop off of clothes) Changing a poopy onesie is a delicate task. You must very carefully stretch the hell out of it to not get poop all over the baby's back and head. This particular poop also required 5 being turned over onto his stomach so that I could wipe the excess poop off of his back. He had already had a bath this morning, and unless it's an extreme emergency, I don't bathe one kid more than once in a day.

When Donkey woke up from his nap, I could smell poop from the hallway (3). I knew it was going to be a good one. But his poops are tricky. Some of the worse smelling ones are the most compact and easy to clean. I was hoping for one of those. I didn't get my wish. This diaper was full front to back with gross, mashed poop. He had poop up the front, all over his balls and dong (as my boys refer to their boy parts... again, not the name I would use for it). I always give Donkey a toy to hold while I change him. It keeps him from squirming around and trying to get off the changing table. So, while I'm holding his legs back with my left hand, I'm wiping his butt with my right hand, all the while holding my breath because the smell could make me barf all over the place. Suddenly, the toy he's holding isn't good enough, and in a split second he throws it on the floor and reaches down and sticks his hand right on his poop covered dong. He now has Poop Hand. I had to maneuver around everything and wipe his hand off, then go back to wiping his butt, and he sticks his hand down there again. More Poop Hand. I don't have enough hands to hold down his hands and hold his legs back, and before I can even react to wipe his hand again, he grabs my hand that's holding his legs. Now we both have Poop Hand. To make it worse, I had to make his hand a priority over my own because I didn't want him touching anything else, or God forbid, putting his hand in his mouth. He didn't, and I was able to clean his hand off, wipe my own hand, and use my arm to hold his legs back and not allow his hand around to his diaper. My husband came in then and we decided Donkey just needed a bath at that point. As soon as my husband took over, I ran to the bathroom to wash and wash and wash my hands. I do not enjoy having Poop Hand.

After we recovered from this incident and Donkey was clean, Princess yelled up the steps, "Trouble pooped in his underwear!" (4). I asked him if he did, and of course he said no. I told him to come up so I could check, and to my delight, he came upstairs and went right over to Daddy so he could check him. My husband said it wasn't a huge mushy one, just a few turds, so he took him upstairs. I told him to hurry up because those turds have a way of falling out of Trouble's underwear and on more than one occasion I have found turds on the floor. While he was changing him, I heard my husband say, "Stop it, Trouble, stay still. Oh, come on... now  I have poop on my hand!". He ended up with Poop Hand too!

Later on, Princess went running up the steps with a book yelling that she had to poop (5). Thankfully she takes care of her own business. We had enough Poop Hand for one day!

Two months in...

I was looking back at some Facebook messages with friends from the past few months. The recent messages have to do with the baby, our kids, art projects, upcoming events, sickness, sleep, etc. Then I got a little further back, and I hit the messages from when I was pregnant. Then I reread my blog post from January, where I basically complained about being pregnant the whole time. It got me to thinking about how weird it is to be pregnant one minute, then blink and suddenly have a 9 week old baby.

just born

2 months old



It's weird to think back to that time, when I was still pregnant and 5 was just "the baby". We had his name picked out, and referred to him by name with the kids (kept it a surprise to everyone else until he was born), but still couldn't imagine him. At that point in time, I couldn't imagine not being pregnant, or holding the baby. I couldn't imagine having five kids. There was so much unknown. When I think about the day before the baby was born, I laugh at how much I was worrying.  I was so worried about actually going to the hospital and leaving the kids at home. Mainly, I worried about Donkey. He was only 11 months old, and he was my baby. He was/is such a Momma's Boy. I cried and cried the night before my induction when I put him to bed because I knew I was leaving him for two days and that when I came home, life wouldn't be the same. I literally typed five pages of "instructions" on taking care of the four kids while we were in the hospital. My husband could have come home, but between my parents and my aunt, the kids were covered. So we took advantage of the mini vacation in the hospital, a few days on our own getting to know the new baby before starting our life as a family of seven.

The worrying and the complaining were so unnecessary. I knew it at the time, but I still did both all the time. I complained about being uncomfortable. In my defense, two back-to-back pregnancies really took a toll on my body. Heartburn was terrible, my back, hips, and tailbone hurt constantly, I was either nauseous, starving, or throwing up all the time, and pretty miserable. And the worrying was for nothing. I had already given birth four other times. I knew what to expect in the delivery room. I knew what it was like to bring home a new baby. I knew I would love him just as much as his brothers and sister. But I still worried. I was scared of the unknown.

My labor and delivery went really well. I mean it wasn't pain-free, but I've come to realize I'm tougher than I give myself credit for. Also, whoever invented the epidural is sheer genius! You lose all your dignity in the delivery room, and by the fifth time, I didn't care who was in there. The maintenance man could have been there for all I cared when I was 10 cm and feeling insane pressure. (Funny story, the maintenance man was actually in the room when I was in labor with Pirate. Not when I delivered though!) And the second he was born, the second I saw that cute little face and the big eyes looking at me, that I had imagined for 39 long weeks, I was completely thoroughly in love. I loved him before I met him, but that grew when I got to see him. The kids came to see him that afternoon and loved him right away. I think they're just used to new babies. I seem to have one every year! 



When we got home and settled, everything just kind of fell into place. My husband was off for two weeks, which was a huge help. I cried when he went back to work. But then I was on my own and found my own groove with all the kids.



Obviously there have been a lot of ups and downs in the past 9 weeks- lots tons of diaper changes, crying kids, crying mommy, rearrangements (is that a word?) in the rooms and in schedules, and milestones with the kids. Pirate lost his first tooth, Princess lost two teeth, Donkey got four molars within three weeks, and Trouble got a couple molars. I didn't realize we had so much happening with teeth until I wrote that! Most of all, there has been a LOT of love going on in this house. A lot of crazy and annoying things happen here, and it's chaotic pretty much all the time, but I don't just focus on that. There is a lot of love here, and it makes all the craziness worth it.



Two months in and everything is going well. The kids are happy and healthy and that's what is most important. I couldn't imagine life without 5. He is just a perfect completion to our family. As much as I couldn't picture life with him when I was pregnant, I can't imagine life without him now. He's cute as can be, with the most lovable chubby cheeks. The kids adjusted just fine to life with another new baby. Donkey had the hardest adjustment, but now he's doing great too. Two weeks after 5 was born was Donkey's first birthday, and we made sure we had a celebration for him, even though he won't remember it. We want to make sure the kids all know that even though we have a big family, each one of them is special to us and deserves to be celebrated.

Things aren't perfect. I don't strive for perfection. People say, "I don't know how you do it. I could never have five kids.". Since giving them back is not an option, we just do it. We just take care of them and love them and do our best. It's not easy by any means. But they are our children and we love them and do what we have to for them. And count down the days until they are out of the house! Just kidding... sort of :)

The Fab Five :)



Lock the TV settings!

Our TV is on a lot. Like most of the day. It doesn't mean my kids are glued to it 24/7 or anything like that. Usually it's on because they go outside and forget to turn it off. But it is on most of the time, to the point that when Trouble was a little toddler, he would say "Uh-oh" and point to it when the TV was off, like it was broken. We stick to a few specific channels for the kids, mainly Nick Jr and Nickelodeon, Disney Jr and Disney. They think it's neat that if they miss a show, it will come on again 3 hours later on the West channels. We also have DVR, which I believe might be the greatest invention ever. Seriously, the ability to watch a show after it comes on, fast forward through commercials or boring parts, and keep a show to watch over and over... Genius! I can get through my soap opera in 15 minutes! Mickey Mouse Clubhouse is the only show that Donkey actually sits and watches, and having it in the DVR got us through a couple days and nights when he was sick. Needless to say, I have several episodes memorized :) We also have On Demand on Dish Network, but we don't use it much.

Princess has been able to use the remote for a while. She is the one who will put on shows for the boys, change the channels, and check out the schedule for what is on later. One reason she is able to do this is because she can read. That makes the menu easier to understand. The other reason is that she is responsible and knows the channels and what they are allowed to watch. If a new iCarly or Victorious is coming on Saturday night, she'll ask if she can record it. She knows to ask. She also knows how to correctly set the DVR to record new episodes or record something one time.

Pirate is another story. He just recently started using the remote to change channels. He knows the channel numbers for the shows they can watch, and can read enough letters to pick the shows. He also learned to go into the DVR to pick shows. He figured out the two words starting with P mean Peppa Pig and the words with M mean Mickey Mouse. Over the past few months he's learned how to spell the names of other shows and he can go into the DVR and put shows on for himself and Trouble. (No, I'm not saying that sitting your kid in front of the TV menu should be how they learn how to read!) Then Pirate started getting adventurous and trying to record shows. I guess he thought he saw us do it enough that he could figure it out for himself. All of a sudden, I was finding that the few shows I record during the day were being stopped so something else would record. So, I told him he could not record shows without a grown up or Princess being with him. Even Princess asks if she can record her shows.

He stopped playing with the remote, or so I thought. I had made a couple of folders in the DVR to keep shows grouped together. We have a Halloween folder, a Christmas folder, and a Kids' movies folder. That way we don't have to scroll through everything to get to those shows. The whole DVR goes by date, so the Halloween folder is all the way at the bottom, since we haven't added to it since October. Same with the Christmas folder. If you're wondering why I keep these shows, it's because my kids are weird. Sometimes they want to watch Rudolph or the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown in the middle of April. Anyway, all of a sudden the Christmas folder was at the top of the DVR. I looked to see what had been moved into it, and found Law & Order SVU  at the very top. Then I found that he had moved a bunch of other shows into other folders as well. At least he wasn't trying to watch those shows! They're locked from viewing, but apparently not from being moved around. So, I told him he couldn't use the remote anymore at all.
That didn't last long though, because when things get crazy with the babies, it's easy to tell him to put on a show downstairs. Yes, I sometimes send my kids to watch TV to get them out of my way. Don't judge unless you also have 5 kids. I made sure I told him not to move any shows around in the folders.

The next day, I went into the DVR to watch something in my "spare" ten minutes, and found 37 Spongebob episodes had recorded. Princess had been at school, and Trouble just uses the remote as a weapon. He doesn't try to put shows on, so I knew it had to be Pirate. When I checked the schedule, I kid you not, Spongebob was scheduled to record every half hour for the entire day. It was the weekend, and I guess there's nothing on but Spongebob all day. Apparently he tried to record an episode, but hit Record All instead. I took the remote out of the basement for good.

I thought we were over the whole remote issue after that incident this weekend. Yesterday my husband called from work and said to make sure the remote stays out of Pirate's hands. He had logged onto our account online and saw that our bill was $60 more than it should have been. He called the company to see what was up, and was told that we rented 8 Pay-per-View movies last month, including Happy Feet Two four different times. OMG!!! Pirate had rented all the kids' movies that came up on the home screen as advertisements! One of which he rented on four different days! Thankfully the very nice customer service lady removed the charges for us. Even more thankfully, my husband caught it yesterday, before our account was automatically debited the payment tomorrow. We locked the whole system, so all they can do now is watch something already recorded and watch the approved (by us) channels.

I swear, there is never ever a dull moment over here!

Toy Overload

Toys took over this house years ago. We try to contain them into certain areas, but it doesn't last more than a day. Pirate is a toy hoarder, and he carries handfuls of toys with him everywhere. And his toys are tiny. His favorites are action figures - little tiny Star Wars guys, little tiny Batman guys, and little tiny pirates. They all have weapons (where his obsession with weapons must come from), that I find all over the place. I found two tiny swords and a machine gun in my bed last week. He knows everything he has, too. When the swords and gun were missing, he knew exactly what he was looking for, but he just didn't remember where he left it.  We keep some toys in the big kids' room, some in the baby boys' room, some in the living room, and tons in the basement. Slowly but surely, by the end of the day, the toys have migrated into all the other rooms of the house. Every night we put up with the same complaining about cleaning up the toys. Princess states that she didn't make the mess. This is usually true, but we tell her that since we cleaned up for her when she was the only child she has to help her brothers put things away. Pirate starts to say he's "just really tired". Then we ask him if he wants to have his snack and he perks up and says yes. Then we say he's not that tired and to start cleaning up. Trouble actually starts putting toys away, but then counters that good action by dumping out another bin of toys, doubling the mess.

Here's how my kids "play". Pirate will take out a bunch of toys, usually little tiny ones, but with a few bigger ones mixed in. He will hoard them all in a corner of the couch and surround himself with pillows "so that Trouble doesn't take my stuff". Or he will sit in the big chair with all of his guys crammed in behind him. He'll play with them for a little while, getting up occasionally to add another random toy to the mix. Then he'll decide he wants to play with something else. So, he'll completely disregard the first pile of toys, leave it where it is, and move onto another hoarding spot with another pile of toys. Same goes for books, he'll drop whatever he was looking at to get something else, never putting anything away in between. Trouble will dump out a bin of toys on the floor, pick out a few to play with and leave the pile on the floor. Within minutes, he throws the toys across the room and grabs something else. Instead of driving the trains and cars on the train table, he drives them across the TV stand, resulting in Princess screaming at the top of her lungs, "MOVE, TROUBLE!!!", which usually results in me yelling at her for being so loud. Donkey will take one toy and walk around with it. He is just happy to be walking around the room instead of being stuck in the play yard. He has just recently gotten into the stage of dumping loads of toys onto the floor. Princess doesn't really play with toys much. Sometimes she'll go into her room and get out all the Barbie stuff and play for a while, only if the boys leave her alone. Most of the time she just wants to play Wii or her DS or games on the computer. (Damn electronics!)

We also experience what I refer to as the "Trickle Down Effect" with toys. When Princess sees Pirate playing nicely, she wants to take his toys. On the rare occasions where Trouble is actually sitting and playing with something, Pirate takes something away from him. When Donkey is walking around with his toy, Trouble takes it from him. Why do they do that? Why can't they let each other be happy and content? The boys constantly steal toys from one another. I guess that's the nature of having siblings.

New toys are exciting for a few days, maybe a week or so tops. Then they end up in the toy box with everything else. They end up broken or lose pieces and become junk. I feel bad because other people spend their money on these toys, and the kids don't appreciate them. Princess is finally at the point where she takes care of her toys. But it took close to eight years for her to get there! Pirate and Trouble both have summer birthdays, only 3 weeks apart. So, we have combined parties for them every year. Sometimes we ask for combined gifts for them, like the sand table, the playhouse, and the water table. Those still get used every year. Last year they got a train table. I thought it would be a great idea. They loved trains, and how fun is a table with all those accessories? It took a long time for my husband to put together.

How could they not love this?! They did, at first. But after time, the train tracks were destroyed, and the table became a storage spot, with crap piled all over it.


This weekend, we rearranged our basement. We wanted to move all of the toys to one side, then have the other part for the sofa and TV, kind of separating it into two spaces. It's a really small room, but we made it work. Princess and Pirate spent the day with my grandparents on Saturday, so we had less kids in our way. During nap time, my husband and I started moving the toys, but decided to get rid of a bunch of them. There were toys that I didn't even realize we had.




one of the piles of toys

 We got rid of anything broken or missing pieces, put some things in a pile for a yard sale we want to have in a few weeks, and organized everything else. It took a LONG time. I laughed that they were the ones that made all the messes and we were the ones cleaning and organizing, again.  Then I went through the bookshelf and cleaned out the books, threw away ones that were ripped, missing pages, and the few that were just covers. No clue where the pages to those books ended up!

By the time we finished everything, the kids were in bed, so yesterday was the first test with the new arrangement. Unsurprisingly, things were all over the place within an hour. I showed them how to clean up and put the toys in the right spots, and by last night when it was clean up time, they got it right. We'll see how long it lasts...

Favorites of the Week

Quotes

 "I wonder how the monsters get their wieners out to go potty on Monsters Inc." - Pirate

"Trouble, come here and stand next to this big ruler so we can weigh ourselves". - Pirate, standing by the awesome growth chart made for us by the one and only Naptime Decorator. One day he'll know the difference between measuring height and weight.

"Mommy, don't cut my fingernailers and toenailers!"  - Trouble when it was his turn. One of my weekly highlights is cutting 100 fingernails and toenails.

"How will Santa get in our house since we covered the chimney?" - Princess and Pirate simultaneously, upon realizing the wood burning stove was gone, closing off Santa's access to the house. (We're going to leave him a key this year.)

"You come change donkey. He smells like a poopy diaper."  - Trouble, after he busted into Donkey's room and woke him up from his nap.

"Mommy, I'm really, really done. Hurry up!"  - Pirate

"My tummy sure feels hungry for some candy after all that pooping I did." - Pirate

"Mickey!" - Donkey, when he saw him on TV. He has said it before, but I just love seeing how his face lights up when he sees his friends on the screen!

"Mommy said I have stinky feet, but it was her feet she smelled." - Princess explaining to my husband how I accused her when in fact, it was my own feet that I smelled. Curse you, flip-flops!

"Margarita time!" - Me to my husband when he got home from work tonight. I've been dreaming of this time all week.

Other fun happenings

I used three diapers to change 5 once this week. One lost a tab while I was trying to put it on, the next one was used as a shield when he started peeing all over the place, and finally the last one was able to be used. You'd think I was a novice diaper changer!

Swing poop - when 5 pooped while in the swing so it squished all up his back. Made it extra fun to change when the poop was on his onesie that had to be lifted over his head. Needless to say it went straight into the trash. I'm not scrubbing shit off of clothes.

Donkey getting his first black eye. I was literally right next to him when he fell down holding a toy dump truck. His face hit the back of the dump truck and gave him a shiner right under his eye. Seriously, not even two minutes later he fell down again, holding the same truck, and got a fat lip. That toy has been banished.

There is never a dull moment in this house of chaos!

Career Day

Pirate had Career Day at school today. We found out about it at the beginning of the month and started talking about different things he might want to be when he grows up. At first he said he doesn't want to be a grown up; he wants to stay a kid forever. He added that he wants to live with us forever. I asked him why he doesn't want to grow up and he said "Because then I'll be too tall and my head will touch the sky". After explaining that people stop growing, he decided "Well, maybe I'll grow up one day.".

We started thinking of different careers he could have. The school tries to keep the kids from choosing Halloween costumes like superheros and wants them to choose some kind of job. The first and obvious choice for Pirate was for him to be a pirate. The boy is obsessed with pirates. He named every part of his costume he would wear. When I asked him what a pirate does, he replied, "Clean the ocean and steal stuff.". We looked some more.

Next, Pirate went through all of the dress ups we own. He thought Optimus Prime would be a good choice. When I said no, he asked about Bumble Bee. Again, I explained that Transformers are awesome, but not really a job he could have one day. I also said no to Batman, Darth Vader, and Spiderman. He totally didn't understand why none of those weren't good professions. He decided he didn't want to be a cowboy (Woody) or a construction worker (Handy Manny).

We talked about some other careers. He has an uncle who is a police officer, and an uncle who is a firefighter. He said those are both cool jobs, but he'd want to be a police officer first, "because they get to have a gun.". Pirate gets very excited when he sees my brother in law in his uniform, especially when he gets a glimpse of his gun. I was also told that firefighters are cool because "They get to use axes". Mental note to remember his obsession with weapons. When I told Pirate that he could wear something of his uncle's to be a police officer (I was thinking hat), he said "Good. I just want to take his gun." I told him guns are not for school and they are not for kids. They are only for grown ups who are police officers. He said that was fine. He just wanted to catch some bad guys and take them to jail.

In the end, he chose to be a chef, like Daddy. He wore a chef hat and an apron and carried a spatula. We had to fill out a little form that went like this:

1. What is your career?  Chef

          2. What type of education do you need for your career?Chef school (Culinary school)

3. What kind of tools do you need for your career? measuring cups, spatula, and cooking stuff

4. Why do you like your career? Because Daddy is a chef. And I like food!

Here's my little chef with his "Spongebob Spatula". I guess we couldn't really get away from characters!