Anyone who's ever had a baby boy knows the importance of covering up during diaper changes and baths. You would think someone with their third baby boy would be a pro at diaper changing. For the most part, I am a pro at it. I can change those wet diapers in no time. However, there is a time that all parents have experienced. A time where you are so sleep deprived that you can't see straight. Where you are up at 4am after barely sleeping two hours since the last feeding, and waking to every single noise your newborn makes while he sleeps. All you want to do is get the changing and feeding done so you can attempt a few more minutes of shut eye until the baby (or one of the other kids) wakes up again. Any mistakes made at this time don't really count.
A few months ago, when Donkey was just days old, I was in this above described phase. I felt as though I was walking around in a fog during the day, and the night was much worse. I am incredibly lucky to have my husband. He and I would take turns during the night feedings for my son. But even so, I still woke up every time the baby did. I never felt fully rested. And I'm pretty grumpy in the middle of the night. I like my sleep. One night, it was my turn. I picked Donkey up out of the bassinett, and he was soaked through his clothes. The bassinett sheet was also wet. Wonderful hubby woke up and changed the sheet. I may or may not have been stomping around making a lot of noise to wake him. I took the baby downstairs to the changing table. (We don't use his room for changing during the night because we don't want to wake the monster. I mean 2 year old.) I got downstairs and took his clothes off, and realized we didn't have any diapers there. Covered him up in a blanket, laid him in the pack & play, went upstairs, grabbed some diapers, back to baby. I'm sure I was uttering some inappropriate words at the time as well, but my memory is a little unclear. I changed him, put new clothes on, and swaddled him in a clean blanket then made his bottle.
I went to my usual spot in the glider and started feeding him. Parents know how newborn feedings go. They take forever! He kept falling asleep, and I'd have to wake him up. I could feel myself falling asleep, dreaming of how nice it would be to sleep in my bed for longer than an hour at a time. I jolted awake to feel my arm was wet, because he was just drooling the formula back out of his mouth. At least I knew he needed to burp. I burped him, and he took some more bottle. Then he made the face. The poop face. Once he finished his business, we were back to the changing table. Thankfully I had brought down more than one diaper. I cleaned him up, and thought that I was lucky it wasn't a blow out. Then I stopped thinking for 2 seconds. I closed up the diaper and leaned down to put it in the trashcan. Note - I did not take any steps away from the changing table, just simply leaned over to the small trash can next to me. In that fraction of a second I heard a gurgling sound. I thought he was spitting up so I went to lean him to his side to make sure he didn't choke. But there was no spit up. And he was wet. His hair was wet, his face was wet, his clothes were wet. The top of the changing table and the arm of the sofa behind it were wet. Holy crap, I hadn't covered him when I leaned down to put the diaper in the trash. He peed all over the place. Pee on him, on his clothes, on the sofa... Pee everywhere. And the gurgling sound? He peed in his mouth. I had no choice but to start crying. I was very hormonal, tired, and worried that something bad would happen to him after peeing in his own mouth. Somehow I was able to pull it together to change his clothes again, clean up the changing table, sofa, his hair, and his body. Thankfully Donkey went right back to sleep. And so did I.
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