The Morning

People often tell me these are the best years of my life, that I need to enjoy this time because it goes by so quickly. In some ways, I agree. Princess is almost 8 and a half. To think I was pregnant with her 9 years ago, in my early twenties, makes me feel like the time has flown by. In other ways, I secretly hope these are not the best days of my life, as I seem to spend them wiping butts & noses, playing waitress to my kids' food demands, and doing laundry nonstop. (It's amazing how much laundry 7 people can go through in a day.) So, it might make me a bad parent, but yes, sometimes I hope these are not the best days of my life.

In talking about a day, I thought I'd share my morning so far today. It is Spring Break, so all 5 kids are home all day. Yesterday was the first day, and I must have heard "MOMMY!!!" 254,876 times. It got to the point where I did my best to tune it out. So here has been my day so far. And keep in mind it is only 10:20am.

Wake up at 3am to the baby making grunting noises. Pray he goes back to sleep or that hubby gets up with him. Fall back asleep. Wake up at 4am to crying baby. Get up to feed baby (still wishing DH would get him but knowing DH has to get up for work at 6 am). Feed baby, thankful for the iPad and the ability to play Words with Friends, browse Pinterest, and read Facebook posts in the middle of the night.

At 5am, put baby back to bed. Climb into my bed to find a 2 year old in my spot. Put him back in his bed. Go back to sleep.

Wake up at 6am to DH's alarm, fall back asleep.

Wake up at 7am to crying baby. Hold him in my bed to get a few extra minutes of sleep. Besides it's too soon for him to eat again.

Get up for good at 8ish. Check on oldest 3 kids, who had the good sense to go downstairs and watch tv. Get baby dressed, feed him his bottle.

Put baby in swing, go upstairs and get the one year old up. Get him dressed. Make mental note (that will surely be forgotten) that both babies are low on diapers. Bring him downstairs.

Play the role of short order cook to make breakfast for the 4 kids, as they seem to think my kitchen is a full service restaurant. Pop tart for Trouble, but it has to be blueberry or he throws a fit. Cereal for Princess & Pirate, although they both complain about it. (side note- the kids go through favorite food phases. When they eat a lot of something we get it at BJs. We bought bulk cereal, and they immediately did not want it anymore. We have a ton to go through, so today I made them eat it, hence the complaining). Pirate wants Cornflakes with milk. Princess wants Cheerios with milk & banana. By the time I get their cereal out, Trouble wants another pop tart. Then I mix up the baby's oatmeal, cut up his banana, and give him his cup of milk. The big three finish and go to play.

I feed Donkey his oatmeal, and tell him to stop throwing banana on the floor. Remind myself I need to clean the floor later.

Finally, I get to pour myself a cup of coffee and eat my breakfast. Make mental note that I need to start a store list and add coffee to it.

While eating and trying to enjoy my coffee, I get paged 17 times by the kids playing downstairs. They are mainly tattling on each other.

Finish breakfast, let Donkey out of high hair (making mental note of how gross the high chair is and how I wish the Easter bunny would bring us a new one) so he can walk around while I clean up.

Empty dishwasher & reload. Wipe up mess on counter, noting we need new sponges.

Take a break to free Donkey, who has wedged himself under the dining room chair, wearing the chair like a turtle shell. Notice he is eating something. He swallows before I can see what it is. Hope that it is just a Cheerio, but know it could be anything.

Realize that there is no more music coming from baby swing. Check and see that the swing has stopped. Luckily he's still sleeping. Mental note to change the batteries.

Have the following conversation in my head...Do we have batteries? I'll get some later when I go out. Wait, where am I going today? Right, my 6 week doctor appointment. I need to work in a shower today. Then Easter basket shopping. Crap, I should make a list of what to get. Where is the notebook? I'll make a list later, Donkey needs to take a nap. Shoot, I need to change his sheet. Oh right, there is still laundry in the dryer from last night.

I discontinue the conversation with myself so I can check my email for a coupon I got the other day. When I get online, I get sidetracked and check Facebook, Pinterest, WWF, then decide to blog about my morning. Now I need to go put Donkey down for his nap, get the kids dressed, and find that darn notebook so I can make all these lists!

Mother of the Year

I had #5 six weeks ago. I haven't had a lot of time to blog, mainly because I'm wiping butts and noses more than ever. I'd like to catch up on posts, but I know that probably won't happen. I've been trying to catch up for over a year.
Just a few things that have happened recently to prove why I will undoubtedly become Mother of the Year.

A few weeks ago, Trouble turned to me and said. "Mommy, I'm gonna kick lour ass!". His Ys sound like Ls, so he meant he was going to kick my ass. I proceeded to laugh my butt off, prompt him to say it 4 more times, one of which was on camera. A better parent would probably discourage him from saying it. After a few days of telling people he would kick their asses, he forgot about it and stopped saying it.

Trouble has also started saying "Jesus Christ!". This is not meant in a good way, due to how I say it and my own context. Other things coming from Trouble's mouth include "Damn It!" and "What the hell?". Reality check - I need to watch my language. We have gotten him down to "Darn it" and "What the heck?". It's a start.

Last week, I desperately needed to sit and enjoy my coffee. Pirate and Princess were both at school, and the two babies were both still asleep. Trouble was the only one with me, and he can't really be left on his own. So, I let him sit at the table with me and play with scissors. It sounds worse than it is... He was just practicing cutting paper. Normally I would never let him hold scissors, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

More Potty Training Round 3

We really slacked off on potty training Trouble around the holidays, and even into the new year. But we are back on track, and he's in underwear every day, except at naptime and bedtime. He's had several dry naps and even a few dry overnights. This is very exciting because we really don't want three kids in diapers. Since I am due in less than 3 weeks, I know Trouble will still be in diapers at least when he's sleeping for a while with the other two, but that still beats wearing diapers all the time. Every once in a while he tells us he has to pee, but for the majority of the time, I take him to the potty about every hour. It's working well so far. He has had a few accidents, but that's to be expected.
Here's the problem. He refuses to poop on the potty. I mean, straight up refuses. He freaks out when he has to poop and starts crying and throwing a fit. We have thrown away several pairs of underwear that he has pooped in, mainly because we didn't want to clean them. He's also sneaky and will wait until he gets his diaper on at bedtime to poop. He will go 2-3 days without pooping, then poop 4 times in one day to catch up. Those 4 times in the same day all take place in his underwear or diapers, never the potty. He says he's scared. I guess it is scary to poop sitting down when you're used to standing in a corner pooping. But how can it feel better to have poop smooshed all over your butt than to have it fall into a toilet? I don't get it. For now, we just keep on trying. My only hope is that he's not 12 years old asking for a diaper to poop in after middle school!

Tales from Naptime - part 2

Back to back posts? Wow, I'm even impressed with myself! These two stories go together, and if I wait another 5 months to start blogging again, I'll surely forget the stories. Actually, since it's a Trouble story, I'll remember.
So, last Thursday was the diaper incident. Diapers everywhere. I felt so annoyed at Trouble and got all upset about how he makes everything harder on me that day. I had no idea that diapers were nothing compared to the following day's nap.
Friday went like Thursday, except I didn't have my nephew that afternoon. Lunch was normal, then I laid Trouble down for his nap. Dejavu, I heard Trouble on the monitor making noise, jumping, and opening drawers, while I was giving Donkey his bottle. Although that day I had wised up. I took the diaper stacker out of the bedroom, and for good measure took out the hamper too. So I figured he had just pooped again and I'd change him and get him to go to sleep. Thinking back on the incident, I'm picturing myself walking up the steps with that "Dun, Dun, Dun" music playing. What I walked into I was not expecting. I opened the door and smelled poop. Then I saw the box of wipes on the floor and one in Trouble's hand. He appeared to be wiping the floor. He looked at me and said, "I put the wipes back.", and began stuffing wipes back into the wipe box. He takes a nap with the curtains closed and a nightlight on, so I had to turn on the big light to see what was really happening. And then I saw it... lotion everywhere. Now, when I called my husband in a panic and freaking out, I used the word everywhere and was later told that was an exaggeration. So, I'll try not to exaggerate here. There was a whole lot of lotion in a whole lot of places around the room. It was on Trouble's bed (top sheet, bottom sheet, and comforter), and there were small splashes of lotion on each of his stuffed animals. It was on the floor (which apparently he was trying to clean up). It was on the front of the dresser, on the top of the dresser, the changing table pad cover, the wall, the nightlight, the corner shelf, the fan, Donkey's crib, the basket where said lotion was taken from, as well as on every single thing in that basket. This is a big wicker basket that we keep lots of stuff in - diapers, extra pacifiers, nail clippers, combs, toys, diaper cream, wipes... and lotion. I guess if there is a silver lining here it's that he opened the old bottle of cheaper lotion and not the brand new bottle of Aveeno. Apparently he climbed up the drawers of the dresser onto the changing table part and started going through the basket. The lotion must have struck his fancy and he just started squirting it all over. The bottle of lotion was completely empty when I threw it away in the evidence and destroyed stuff pile. I can't say for certain that he didn't put any lotion in his mouth. His face smelled like lotion, as did his hands, and he never got sick. But I think that question will just remain unanswered. Since he had pooped, I had to change him on the floor, which at this pregnant is pretty hard. I took him into my room for a second day in a row (after a lot of yelling... I'm not proud of it, but seriously, the lotion was all over!). Thankfully there wasn't a lot of lotion inside Donkey's crib, mostly on the outside bars. I was able to wipe that off so that he could take his nap. I left everything else until later.
After naps I wasn't quite as upset. My husband (lifesaver) was home early and helped clean up the mess. In the end, I was able to get a lot of junk out of that big basket. I guess it needed to be cleaned out before the new baby was born anyway. A lesson was also learned on my part... Don't underestimate Trouble. He can and will get into anything he finds. My husband reminds me that he is only 2 and that the other two did lots of bad things when they were 2 as well. However, I only remember a few things for each of them. Princess and Pirate combined do not equal the amount of horror stories that I have for Trouble. But I hope and pray that he gets out of this "stage" soon!
In the end, that was the last day Trouble had in his room with Donkey. Saturday my husband put together the bunk beds in the big kids' room, and Trouble moved in there. Stay tuned for more stories!

Tales from Naptime - part 1

I have a routine. I do my best to stick to it daily. You can't have four kids and not have a routine. Life would be complete chaos. And it already feels chaotic, so I can't imagine the chaos if there was no routine. I won't bore you with all the details, because as I sit and write out "instructions" on the kids for when I'm in the hospital for 2 days with Baby 5, our day does look pretty boring. Anyway, we have lunch around 12:30 so that naps can start around 1pm. Why naps at 1? Mainly because I wanted to be able to take a nap myself before Princess would get off the bus. Now, naptime at 1 doesn't mean everyone is asleep right at 1. It's a process. Since Trouble started climbing out of the crib, I had to put him down for his nap first to give him time to fall asleep. He had since moved into a toddler bed, but still got out all the time to bother Donkey. So, to stick to the routine, I lay Trouble down at 1, clean up from lunch, give Donkey a bottle, then lay him down. While I feed Donkey his bottle, I pray the whole time that Trouble actually went to sleep. For the most part, he fell asleep without a problem. Sometimes he would stay awake because he had pooped. This would push things back.
I recently started babysitting my nephew two afternoons a week. He is 3 months old and such a cutie! He's no problem at all, and still in that glorious stage where he'll sleep anywhere, no matter how noisy it is. Princess is at school, so it's only the 4 boys here when I have my nephew. Pirate can play on his own and doesn't nap anymore. I don't try to take naps when my nephew is here because I feel like it's irresponsible. Plus it never works out that all 3 little boys sleep at the same time.
Last week it was time for Trouble's nap. Trouble is now 2 and 7 months. I am in no way ready for him to give up his naps. Princess napped until she was 5. Seriously, I thought that was normal, but now I realize I was just lucky. Pirate gave his naps up last year when he was in the 3's in preschool. Trouble needs a nap. I need Trouble to take a nap! So, I put him in his bed around 1. I like to get Trouble and Donkey both to sleep before my nephew gets here at 1:30. That's the plan anyway. I went downstairs and started giving Donkey his bottle, and could hear Trouble on the monitor making noise. Then I heard jumping, then drawers slamming. When Donkey was done his bottle, I put him in the play yard and went up to see what Trouble was doing. I smelled the poop as soon as I got up the steps. I opened the door, and saw a mountain of diapers on his bed. I walked into the room, and saw more diapers in the hamper, and in the dresser drawers which were all pulled out, as well as in Donkey's crib and on the changing table. You might wonder how there were that many diapers. We had just bought a case of diapers at BJs that I had opened and filled the diaper stacker to the very top. Apparently Trouble didn't like the arrangement and flung them all over the room. I changed him, yelled at him, had him help me clean up the diapers, and I put him back in bed. I went downstairs because my brother in law was at the door with the baby. Just as I was getting ready to take Donkey up for his nap, I heard Trouble on the monitor again. I wasn't as patient this time. I took Donkey up, laid him down, and took Trouble in my room to take a nap. I left the diapers all over the room, just so Donkey could get to sleep. In the end, Trouble took a nap in my bed and Donkey had a decent nap because his big brother wasn't trying to climb in his crib with him. We cleaned up the diapers later that evening.

Trying to keep up

I think about blogging. I do definitely think about it. But I rarely get on the computer anymore. Any "free" time I have I try to rest. This pregnancy is wearing on me more than I ever thought it would. I have several stories to share from the past few months. I think this post is going to turn into more of a pregnancy complaint session though. I don't hate being pregnant. But I absolutely don't love it. I am so ready to not be pregnant anymore. I've been pregnant since June of 2010, with the exception of 10 weeks in 2011. That's close to 2 straight years of pregnancy. Being pregnant with a 10 month old and a 2 year old who is trouble, not to mention an 8 year old and a 4 year old... well you can see how it can be difficult. I know for sure (really for sure this time) that this is my last pregnancy. I thought last year was my last pregnancy. I thought Donkey was my last baby. But I was wrong, Baby5 is going to be the last one, for sure! I feel guilty sometimes, thinking I should be enjoying the wonders of pregnancy more than I actually am. I think I should be more excited about every kick and punch that I feel. Instead, I can't wait for the pregnancy to be over. I've never been a great pregnant person. I've never understood the famous people who love their pregnant bodies and everything that goes along with being pregnant. I think that the reason I'm feeling it more this time is because I've been pregnant for so long. My body didn't even get a chance to heal itself between these two babies. Donkey will only be 11 months old when this baby is born. So, here are a few things I won't miss when I'm not pregnant anymore, in no particular order... unless I go back and arrange them in order.
1. Maternity clothes - I've had most of the same ones for over 8 years. Not fashionable anymore.
2. Heartburn - it's worse than it's ever been this time. I wake up at night with acid in my throat and feel like I'm choking. I carry antacids everywhere.
3. Exhaustion - I know newborn exhaustion, and I won't love it. But I'm so mentally and physically tired these days that I need a change.
4. Back pain - the baby has a foot or something lodged in my back ribs and it hurts really badly.
5. Hip pain - I have sciatica which is a shooting pain from my right hip into my leg. But I also have constant hip pain.
6. Not sleeping through the night - again, I know that won't happen for a while with a newborn, but I wake up every 30-45 minutes to pee or rotate from one side to the other b/c my hips hurt. And rolling over is no small feat... It's like moving a whale.
7. Being out of breath - I walk up our small flight of stairs (7 steps) and feel like I climbed a mountain.
8. Headaches - I get them more this pregnancy than in the others.

Things I am looking forward to doing when I'm not pregnant anymore:
1. Painting my toenails
2. Running after the kids
3. Carrying the laundry up & down the steps without being out of breath
4. Picking up my 2 year old
5. Sitting on the floor without getting stuck
6. Wearing regular clothes
7. Running... not like a runner, but being able to run out to get the mail, not moving at a snail's pace
8. Sleeping on my stomach!
9. Eating without getting heartburn
10. Having a drink - beer, wine, etc. Not getting drunk, just having a drink

Don't get me wrong... I do think pregnancy is a miracle. It truly is. The fact that I am growing a person inside of me is pretty amazing. And I do love watching my belly twitch and move as he moves around. I look at my other 4 kids and remember when they were inside of me. It's amazing that is how they all started out. So, I do appreciate pregnancy. I am happy to be pregnant... I am just ready to no longer be pregnant!