Grocery shopping during a heat wave

Holy cow, it is HOT out there. The high temperature for Baltimore for tomorrow says 109. That isn't summer. That's hell. The last time I checked, it's around 97 here. It's just like stifling hot out there. It's been like this for a week now, and it is brutal. We haven't gone out of the house during the day all week. I sat on my front porch this afternoon for a few minutes and the cement was burning my butt.  I haven't even wanted to go to the pool. I can see the parking lot from my house, and it has been packed. I don't like when it's that crowded. It's not relaxing, just annoying. I prefer the air conditioned indoors.

Yesterday morning, my dad picked up Princess and Pirate and took them to his house to spend the night. Princess has gone there before a bunch of times, but this was Pirate's first sleepover. He was so incredibly excited! He normally sleeps with around 75 stuffed animals on his bunk bed. He picked up about 50 of them to take for the sleepover. We were able to narrow it down to two. Thankfully he has an overnight bag and I told him anything he took had to fit in there. Princess is a pro at packing now, so she knew exactly what she was taking. The kids left around 11:30, and suddenly I only had three kids at home. Although Princess and Pirate are the "easiest" to care for, it still made such a difference to only have three kids. Rest time was great because all three little boys slept and I had 'Me Time', which unfortunately consisted of doing dishes and folding laundry, but at least it was quiet!

Usually my husband goes to the grocery store Thursday evening after work. He just goes on the way home to get it out of the way so we don't have to go during the weekend. I am very blessed in the husband department! Yesterday we had so many leftovers from our 4th of July cookout, he said he would go after work today instead. This morning, he had to get up at 5am to go to work, but was going to get done early, stop at the grocery store, and come home early to start the weekend. At 7:30, he texted me that someone called out and he had to stay through and work the dinner shift. I guess that's the downside to being the boss. So, since he's working 13 straight hours today, I thought the least I could do is get the grocery shopping done. Well aware of the fact that it was 300 degrees outside and I'd have to take three kids three and under with me, I decided it was still better than being at work all day.

My original plan was to get out the door by 9. Even with only three kids here, I couldn't get my act together, and we didn't leave until close to eleven. The big kids were going to be home around one, so I had to move it. Thankfully Curly just gave up his morning nap so I didn't have to work around that. Once everyone had shoes on and Superchunk was in the carrier, we headed to the van. Usually I make a couple trips to load everyone in, but today I was determined to do it all at once. I carried the carrier and held Curly's hand and hoped Trouble wouldn't run out into the street. Once everyone was buckled, I blasted the a/c and crossed my fingers that the little bit of gas I had would be enough for the trip to the store, because more than one stop was out of the question.

I was under the assumption that the store wouldn't be too crowded, but apparently when it's a zillion degrees out everyone goes to the store. I got a spot close to the cart return so I wouldn't have to carry everyone too far. Bonus, there was one of those carts with the bench seat on the back of it. It's not a car cart like Trouble really wanted, but it was one big enough to hold everyone. I parked that bad boy right up next to the van and unloaded the boys, then buckled them into the bench seat, pushed them around to the other side, unloaded the carrier, and hooked Superchunk onto the cart. This particular kind of cart is great to hold all of my kids, but weighs about 1000 pounds and is hard to push and maneuver. I really wanted to take a picture of it, but trying to fish my phone out of the bottom of my purse while steering this cart wasn't happening. The novelty of the fun cart wore off after about five minutes in the store and Trouble started asking to switch to a car cart. While it would have been really fun to walk to the entrance of the store, transfer three kids and some groceries to a different cart, and finish shopping, I passed on that idea. Trouble needed to make his own fun, so he held onto the strap that was hanging off of Superchunk's carrier, said he was on a train, and made a "Choo-Choo" noise as loud as possible for the rest of the trip. Curly started whining, I guess because he wanted a strap too. I gave him one of Superchunk's toys, and we played a fun game of 'Throw-the-toy-on-the-ground-and-have-Mommy-pick-it-back-up" for a few aisles. Somehow Superchunk slept through all of this. I maneuvered my giant cart that progressively got heavier through the store in record time. There was no backing up or going back to an aisle I already left. If I missed something, I'm going back alone to pick it up another day!

Finally, we made it to the checkout section. For some crazy reason, although the store was crowded, there were only three cashiers open - one of which was an express lane. Clearly this was not an express trip. And doesn't it figure, as soon I got close enough to start unloading my groceries, two more cashiers open registers. Such is my luck! The checkout was the hardest part of the trip. Even though this cart was enormous, I could still keep it in the middle of the aisles so that Curly and Trouble couldn't reach anything on the shelves. But at the checkout, it is very narrow. Trouble was right up on the candy section, touching everything. Curly was reaching for a balloon. Trouble started asking me every two seconds for a balloon, for a pack of M&Ms, for Skittles, for gum, for a different balloon... you get the picture. Curly started whining for Goldfish he saw. Superchunk started crying. In my head, I was cursing the cashier for being so nice to the person in front of me that they wanted to have a long conversation. She was super sweet to us too, despite the meltdowns that were beginning. When she was giving me my receipt, she asked if I needed help out to the car. I was tempted to ask if I could get help once I got home, but I didn't. I pushed the ginormous cart out the door into the sweltering heat and wished I could snap my fingers and be home. After I walked the 10 miles to the van, I loaded the kids back in, piled in the groceries, returned the cart (smart to park by the cart return!) and blasted the A/C. I was beyond a hot mess. Sweat was just pouring off my face. I looked back at the boys, and they seemed completely unphased by the heat. Burger King is in the same shopping center as the grocery store, so I told Trouble I'd get him some fries for being so good in the store. I knew deep down that the prize was really for me for surviving the store trip! 

Driving home, the gas light came on, but I knew I could make it home. No more field trips for today! When we got home, I took the kids in the house first. Then I really wished I had brought the grocery store helper home with me. I piled as many bags on my arms as possible and got everything in the house in two trips, again sweating like crazy. Before I put anything away, I fed the kids and inhaled my own Kids' Meal. Fast food always makes things better. Now I have no intentions of leaving the house anytime soon!

Getting old sucks.

I'm only in my early thirties, and this getting older thing totally sucks already. Why do we have to age? In my head I feel like I'm 25 at most. In my head, I also picture myself with the body I had when I was 20, but that's another story :) I know things could be worse, and I also know they will progressively get worse as I get older. I'll try to stay positive about things, but at the moment this aging thing is getting on my nerves. Here are some things that are bothering me right now that I just don't understand.

1. Facial hair - There is no need for women to have a moustache. Or a beard. Or any weird long random hairs on the chin or face in general. Some of the long hairs I find on my face are ridiculous. When I go to get my moustache waxed (which has become a regular occurrence), my lady sometimes asks, "You want whole face?". Does my entire face need waxing?? And how much would that cost? Also in the realm of facial hair, my eyebrows now grow in from my eyebrow line to my lash line. Not like a full on fur, but random eyebrows popping up all over my eye lids. Also not attractive.

2. Gray hair - My hair started turning gray pretty much as soon as I peed on the stick with my first pregnancy, when I was 23. That is really young to start getting gray hair. It's not awful, and I don't have a head full of gray hair, but still... gray hair is not attractive on me at my age. Maybe one day I'll embrace it, but not at age 32 (or 25, as I want to be!).

3. Wrinkles - Again, not acceptable this young. I'd never do the Botox thing or anything like that, but I'd still like to have a few (20+) years before having to deal with lines on my face. I also seem to have a permanent line between my eyebrows, I'm guessing from frowning and yelling at my kids all the time.

4. Hard, crusty feeling feet - I know that sounds gross. I hate feet in general. I can tolerate my kids' feet, but not grown up feet. I have issues with having to see feet on a regular basis at the pool. Don't get me started on  toes, and the length they should be. When I was a kid, I made fun of my mom for having crusty feet. And now, payback is a bitch because I have them too. "Get a pedicure." seems to be the easy solution. Except they are expensive and I end up with about 2 seconds of soft feeling feet. I try to sand these bad boys down as often as possible and slather on as much lotion or Vaseline as I can. I keep up on painting my toenails, especially in the summer, to try to keep them from being totally gross. But the feeling of the hard pieces skin getting caught on a blanket or the sheets is the worst. Why can't we all have soft feet?

5. Skin - The same applies to the skin on the rest of the body. I look at my babies and how soft and pure their skin is, and I am totally jealous. They have this perfect smooth skin. I have to put lotion on twice a day just to not have ashy looking skin, especially in the summer. Then there are freckles and moles all over. And dark spots. And skin tags. And stretch marks. And cellulite. Seriously, is this all necessary? The fat parts are my fault, and the stretch marks are courtesy of the five kids. But all of it combined, on one body, is straight up ugly. And I've seen old people skin... I'm guessing it's all downhill from here!

6. Sagging skin - Maybe it's gravity. Maybe it's fat. Maybe it's age. I don't know. But my eyelids don't seem to be where they used to. Is this why people get face lifts?  If you're a woman, you know your boobs don't stay in place as you get older. And I've had five kids, so it's not a pretty picture. And my butt definitely isn't where it used to be. I have a birthmark on my upper thigh. When I was a kid, it was on my hip. Between getting fat, getting old, and gravity (?) it has traveled downward on my leg. I guess it will be on my foot by the time I'm elderly.

7. Veins - Where did these veins come from? Has the blood in my body increased dramatically since I was younger? I know that pregnancy makes veins more visible because there is indeed more blood going through your body to help the baby. However, I still have more visible veins than I did when I was younger. And I have these ugly spider veins on my calves. Spider veins are exactly what they sound like. Maybe I should get more tattoos to cover the ugly parts of my skin. But then my whole body would be covered in tattoos, and they're expensive too.

8. Aches and pains - I used to be able to wake up and get out of bed feeling great. Now I have to stretch to feel normal. My knees crack when I walk up the steps. My back is sore after a long day. Or a short day. Or when I wake up in the morning. Sometimes my heels or the balls of my feet hurt. Sometimes they hurt at the same time. I'm convinced I'm going to need a walker by the time I'm 40.

9. Metabolism - I think at one point, way, way back, I had some metabolism. I was never a real exercise addict or anything, but I don't think weight just sat on me like it does now. I know, I need to exercise more...or exercise period. And stop eating so damn much food. But I still feel like I was able to burn it off easier when I was younger. I could be wrong.

10. Bladder control - I know this is a result of having so many babies. And no, I don't pee my pants or anything like that. But when my kids wanted me to jump for something the other day, there was a little leak. And jumping jacks are out of the question. Which reminds me I need to do my kegels.

I should mention that I'm not as big of a pessimist as I sound in this post. I know there are good things about getting older. I just can't think of them at the moment!

An interview with a 4 year old

I read in a magazine the other day how some moms interview their kids at the end of the school year and put their interviews in cute albums to save for the kids when they are grown. I'm going to half-ass this project and type my interview with Pirate in a blog. If my blog still exists when he's an adult, he can read it then.
I just Googled "end of preschool child interviews" and a bunch of different ideas came up. I took questions from a few different sites and sat down with my 4 year old to get some answers. The idea is to do this for both kids, but we'll see if I remember.

An Interview with Pirate - June 2012

What is your name?  Andrew
How old are you?  4 but I'm almost 5
Where do you live? Westminster
What does your house look like? it looks like it is painted white
Who do you live with? Mommy, Daddy, Rei, Evan, Grayson, Landon
What is your mom's name? Amy
How old is she? 32
How much does she weigh? 4
What is her favorite thing to do? feed the babies
What is something she does not like to do? clean the toilets
What does she like to eat? bagels
What does she like to drink? coffee
What do you like to do with her? snuggle with her
What is your dad's name? Buster
How old is he? 36
How much does he weigh? 4
What is his favorite thing to do? take us for a walk
What is something he does not like to do?  eat gross stuff
What does he like to eat?  Corn flakes
What does he like to drink? coffee
What do you like to do with him? Play Go Fish

What is your favorite food?  Poptarts
What is a food you do not like to eat? broccoli
Where is your favorite place to eat? Subway
What do you like to order there?  turkey sub with no gross olives
What is your favorite color? red
What makes me happy?  going to the playground
What makes me sad? not getting new Batman toys
What are you afraid of?  monsters
What is your favorite thing to do? Go to the pool
What is something you wish for? more Playmobil Pirates
Where would you like to visit? Disney World
What is your favorite holiday? Christmas
What is your favorite toy? Transformers
What is your favorite animal? dog
What is your favorite book? That Batman book we got at the library
What is your favorite song?  Row, Row, Row Your Boat
What is your favorite game? Hide & Seek
What do you want to be when you grow up? a dentist
Who do you love? Mommy & Daddy & my whole family
What did you like best about preschool? Playing with my friends

Who was your best friend? Sawyer

What did you learn at preschool? I learned words

What did you make?  that octopus on the wall

What do you think kindergarten will be like? I don’t know

What are you excited for in big school? Playing on the big playground there

What do you think you will learn there? How to read

What is something new you want to try this year? playing soccer

If you could get only one present this year, what would it be? The musical Jake boat

I'm impressed he knows the right ages for both of us! I love that we both only weigh 4. I'm not sure if that means 4 pounds or if he has another measurement. This interview clearly took place in the morning because he named the foods we had for breakfast. He just had a dentist appointment this week, so now he wants to be a dentist. He usually changes what he wants to be 3-4 times a week. Disney World is a on the "Maybe one day if we hit the lottery or grow a money tree" list of things we'd like to do with the kids one day. And he asks for the musical Jake & The Neverland Pirates ship about 10 times a day. His birthday is in a month, but that boat is expensive, and he'll love it for about 30 seconds. Not sure it's worth it! Anyway, this was a fun thing to do with my little man. Hopefully I can remember to do this with the other kids one day too!

showing off his 2nd lost tooth